reed writes

LETTER TO THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA (2)

Dear America,

Well, none of my friends down your way really liked my last letter. Not because it was too critical, which was what I was expecting, but because…they said…it was too mealy-mouthed. Too polite. Not direct enough. The problem is, America I feel badly even hinting at criticism of  you. The way things are going up here…it’s a bit like the pot calling the kettle black. We’re having our own problems…like our P.M. (prime minister), is apparently condoning torture in Afghanistan…just like your guy.

So what follows in this letter is not just meant for you, but for the both of us.

The interesting thing is this- the debate seems to be a lot farther ahead down your way. I hope I’m not offending you by implying that you’re not up-to-date.

Anyway, for example, here’s what Lee Iacocca said. You remember him…he used to be the Big Cheese at Chrysler, in its heyday. I think he even solved the debt crisis there during his time.

"Throw the bums out", he said, meaning your president and his administration.

Wow, America, that’s tough language for sure and from a big businessman too!

We don’t have anyone like that up here.

Then there was that Bill Moyers show on PBS called "Buying the War".

Apparently most of your reporters and TV people rolled over and played dead during the runup to the present disaster in Iraq.

I know that nobody likes criticism not  even a country…but then that’s why I’m not criticizing you personally. Just kind of wondering out loud. I know you’ve been really busy with a lot of things lately- what with Katrina still festering and the debt still climbing. But maybe there’s some stuff you just haven’t noticed. But then- as I said- I’m sort of in the same boat.

Iacocca brought up the subject of your debt. What Lee said was this, "The President of the United States is given a free pass to ignore the Constitution, tap our phones, and lead us to war on a pack of lies. Congress responds to record deficits by passing a huge tax cut for the wealthy."

Actually Iacocca went on to say that he didn’t want a tax cut himself- even though he’s rich- so go figure. Maybe he’s senile, but somehow I doubt that. I’m really afraid, America, that we up here may be heading in the same direction.

Another American friend of mine said that she wanted your president impeached for not paying attention to the voters. Mind you- as I said to her- when did any politicians ever do that after they won an election? She laughed a bit and then got a wild-eyed look in her eye and yelled out that Bush had to go-period. The same thing is happening up here, America and believe you me- it’s scary.

We’ve never done any impeaching in "the land of the tree flag", as Mr. Bush once called me…we pretty much just ignore the politicians, try to get on with life after an election and hope for the best.

Anyway, I was surprised to hear that so many of your people said that they had lost faith in your president and want him out of there. Not only that, I was also surprised at how strong the feelings are.

I’m only mentioning this to you America, because we’ve been friends for a long time. We got over that business of your people trying to invade us years back- in 1775, I think it was….and then again in 1812. No hard feelings at all. I think we’re even gone past that business of the softwood lumber deal.

We Canadians are keeping our fingers crossed now though. We sure wouldn’t want to end up like Iraq. So we’re really hoping there are no plans in the works to go after those oilsands out in Alberta. They say there’s enough oil there for all of us.  Heck, you don’t need to invade us for that…we’ll sell you the darn oil…cheap-on credit if you need it.

Besides, my friend, not all my people go on vacation to Cuba. Lots of them still go to Florida and North Carolina and even Texas.

Anyway, America…I won’t say anymore…just that I still love you and wish you the very best. Let’s get together soon for a beer. (After all, I AM Canadian you know- lol).

Sincerely, Your Friend,

Canada.

LETTER TO THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA (1)

Dear America,

First of all, let me say that I have lots of friends down your way…all of whom are intelligent, generous, tolerant and good-hearted. But I find they are also very confused. They’re not quite sure where you’re going as a country. But they honestly don’t know why they’re confused or really how to express it.

Perhaps it’s the mixed messages your leader
sends out. Perhaps it’s that they don’t really understand what is meant by “the war on terror”. Or perhaps it’s because they don’t like the fact that almost everyone in the rest of the world dislikes and distrusts you and don’t really understand why.

By the way do you really like your leader?

This isn’t personal, America…just trying to be friendly.

Incidentally, your ambassador up in Ottawa here has said that I should apologize to you for not joining in the invasion of Iraq back in ’03. Sorry, but I can’t do that. My leader at the time took a close look at that deal and said he thought it probably wouldn’t work out. I actually agreed with him, although a few people, including my present leader Mr. Steve Harper, whom you’ve met, did think it was a really good idea. (I get the feeling though that in your heart of hearts, you also wish that George W.  hadn’t done it).

I know your President wants a victory there, but honestly, – and I think you might agree- he probably ain’t gonna get it. I’m sorry to seem flippant about it but I have the sneaking suspicion that if he took your advice, he’d be pulling the troops out now.

(By the way, does he ever listen to you?)

Secondly, I know how upsetting it was to you…that nasty business back in 2001… when those Saudi Arabian terrorists attacked the Twin Towers in New York and brought them down. I was upset too, because some of my people lost their lives there. But while I’m on that subject, there’s another thing. I know you don’t like uppity Me giving you advice- but I’m just wondering- do you really think it’s a good idea to sell 10 billion dollars worth of high tech weapons to the Saudi Arabians, seeing as how that’s where the majority of those terrorists came from. Just wondering.

You may not have noticed but the Saudi’s are a bit shaky these days. There are some heavy rumours about a revolution there, and I’m deathly afraid that if those weapons you want to sell them fall into the hands of the wrong people…it could be bad. As you know, I seldom agree with the Israeli’s, even though
Mr. Harper thinks they can do no wrong…in this case I’m with them.  my best advice America- hold off on the sale of high tech weaponry to those guys over in Saudi.

<Steve

Thirdly, I know you hate my general approach to foreign policy, what with my support for Cuba and the fact that so many of my people spend their winter vacations down there instead of in Florida. Then too, there was that whole Iran-Contra thing, when we supported the democratically elected government of Nicaragua, which your guys were trying to overthrow. And even further back…we got bad vibes from you when we supported that other democratically elected government in Chile. You know- where your CIA got involved and helped install the Pinochet dictatorship.

Goodness, America, I feel like I’m coming down on you a bit hard. Please don’t think it’s because you screwed us on the softwood lumber deal and trashed the Free Trade Agreement, not at all. Just trying to be friendly.

I don’t have quite enough space to finish this letter right now, so I’ll finish it off next time.

In the meantime, America, I wish you the best.

Sincerely, Your humble friend,

Canada.

THE MEDIA HOUNDS

It’s hardly surprising that so much has been made of those poor British soldiers who were captured by an Iranian patrol boat. This is just the sort of thing that the media thrive on. And it doesn’t matter whether those media are located east, west, north or south of wherever…they love this story. It’s the meat and potatoes of what passes for journalism.

It’s a bit like watching tennis. Statement and response. Statement and response. Or a soccer match- any sport really. There’s lots of "back and forth".(Blair says this, Larijani says that Ahmedinejad hands out a medal… Blah Blah Blah…it’s unlikely they even know who Larijani is- who cares?)

This sort of story allows for lots of colour commentary, speculation, vague knowledge of history and background, description of the players, etc. etc.

It lets the sensation-hungry press, from The New York Times, to BBC to Fox News breathlessly report every nuance of the game without fear of criticism or contradiction. It allows the pundits and editors to raise the spectre of more war, by heightening the rhetoric  and raising its temperature. You even get to make stuff up.

Take this quote from the Times, for example- "Some of the captives, possibly under duress, have admitted to trespassing, and it appears that Iran has made such an admission a condition of their release."

"Under duress". Ah…could be torture. Under Duress, but not necessarily under duress…only Possibly under duress. Possibly under duress but with no attribution. Just pure guesswork on the part of the reporter/editor/publisher or whatever…they’re mostly all the same.

Do I sound cynical about the media? You bet.

Now of course, the media have been pre-empted.